IELTS Writing Sample #185
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Nowadays many countries have very cosmopolitan cities with people from all over the world. How can the government ensure that all these people can live together harmoniously?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.
When writing essays, a common mistake students make is not planning enough. Spend a few minutes brainstorming ideas, e.g. using a benefits / disadvantages table or a mind map, before writing. You can then focus on language issues.
In today's cosmopolitan world it is unusual to find a major city or country where there are no immigrants. People travel more now than they ever did in the past and populations have had to adapt to this transitional lifestyle much more quickly than in the past. Ultimately society, as a group of individuals, directs the way that new arrivals in a country are treated. But the government can do a number of things to support this.
Firstly, all governments should insist that schools teach history and culture from more than one country, not just the home nation. By learning how others have lived we gain insight into alternative cultures and ways of life which makes us more accepting when we meet people from those countries. Of course we don't have time to learn about the history of every country in the world but understanding at least one other culture opens our minds and makes us more tolerant.
In addition, when immigrants choose to settle in a country, the host government should offer free language and culture lessons. It is impossible for new arrivals to integrate if they do not understand the language and habits of their new home. I believe it is important for immigrants to learn the culture of the place they have chosen to settle. By acquiring the language and knowledge about the culture, they will be able integrate more easily and comfortably without necessarily losing their own identity.
Finally the governments of countries should make sure that they have some stringent laws to protect people from aggression or prejudice so that, should an immigrant face terrible attitudes, they have some protection. By ensuring people feel safe the host country shows that it is civilized and promotes integration.
In summary, understanding others is the key to harmonious living but laws should also be in place to protect people from those who can't behave responsibly.
“There are a number of well-defined points made which are relevant and answer the question. The introduction and conclusion are clearly written and overall structure is managed effectively, with a good flow. Paragraphs are arranged logically and sentences linked smoothly. Grammar and vocabulary are sophisticated and error free. The range and accuracy of language and the full answer mean this is level 9.”