IELTS Writing 4 - Task 2

Essay Tip

It is very important to make a good start to your essay. Writing a clear introduction gives you confidence in the exam and helps to make a good impression on the examiner. Many IELTS candidates panic because they do not know how to begin their essay.

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taugh to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Model answer

Nowadays, the purpose of education has changed in South Korea. Some people advocate the competition among children, while others believe that children who are brought up to co-operate with each other will become more responsible and social. There are advantages and disadvantages for both of the arguments.

To begin with, what is the bright side if a sense of competition between children is made? Faced with intense competition, children are stimulated to spend longer time in making efforts. In such situations, it is common for a majority of students in South Korea to have personal tutors who are responsible for teaching them extra knowledge at weekends in order to improve their competitiveness in studies.

Furthermore, during vocations, students prefer to study abroad for a month rather than review their school works. If they have experiences such as going abroad, then it will be easier for them to apply for a well-known high school successfully. Moreover, there are four main school-level and two national examinations to test students’ learning abilities. Generally, only the top 40% of them have opportunities to attend a good quality high school, which requires outstanding performance in previous competition.

On the other hand, as they are busy with independent learning, problems that have been produced cannot be overlooked. Children nowadays become selfish, careless and reluctant to help others especially on the occasion of studies. So there may be a lack of collaboration between them. This should not be encouraged because even though every one of them is intelligent, they still have various weaknesses. Co-operation, indeed, can provide students with opportunities to learn from other candidates and improve their own personalities as well.

In conclusion, I strongly agree that children should not be taught to compete but to co-operate. Nobody is perfect, so people are suggested learning and working together to fulfil themselves. Therefore, I think that parents and teachers should educate children to concentrate on collaboration, instead of competing and ranking.

(324 words)

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